The last few months have been pretty difficult for me, for a number of unrelated reasons. My mental health has taken a dive, as I’ve told you on a number of occasions.
A big difficulty for me right now, as I explained in my last post (Back To Music (Therapy)) is that I don’t know who to trust. I don’t know who is really on my side and who will divulge my confidences to places I’d rather they didn’t go. That’s come about for a specific reason, and the big issue for me now is just re-learning about trusting my friends. I have good friends, who I can trust. It’s just that when someone has abused that trust it takes time to rebuild.
I’ve come to the conclusion that while I do that, I need to take a break from blogging. It really isn’t wise for me to be writing about a lot of the things going on in my life right now, and trying to write about anything else is hampered by the stress I am living with. I simply can’t focus to write. I know that I have already cut back how much I have blogged recently and I feel frustrated by that (and in turn the stress level goes up further).
Last time I took a break from blogging it actually turned out to be for just a short while, and maybe that will happen this time too. For now, I just need to give myself a break.
I will still be writing for A Canvas Of The Minds, and will reblog here, the posts I make.
Sometimes it’s really difficult to know what is the right thing for me. There is a voice inside of me that gets expressed through blogging, and no doubt that voice will want it’s say. I simply need to identify for myself what is safe for me to write about, and what is better left unsaid. That kind of goes against the grain, but I’m going to give it a go for now.
Take care everyone.
♦
“Do the other kids make fun of you? For how you talk?’
‘Sometimes.’
‘So why don’t you do something about it? You could learn
to talk differently, you know.’
But this is my voice. How would you be able to tell when I was talking?”
― Lauren Oliver, Before I Fall
Infinite Sadness... or hope? 